What does the Mac need? A touchscreen would be nice. Lower prices, too, but I can’t complain about what you get for $1,199 (the retail price of an entry-level MacBook Air) when compared to the original Mac at $2,495 in 1984.
You know what a Mac really needs? A parachute. Uh huh. That’s right. A parachute. Why? Well, since 80-percent of all Macs sold these days are notebooks, and notebook is just another way of saying laptop, and laps are notoriously difficult to balance anything upon, the MacBook-whatever could slip and fall to the ground. A parachute that automatically deploys during the fall from the lap to the floor could help minimize damage from the sudden stop, right?
I think Apple should be sued for failing to put a parachute into each Mac.
I know what you’re thinking. “What other stupid ideas do you have, Tera?” I’m glad you asked. Dumb-assed ideas are easy to come up with and so are class action lawsuits to get Apple to bend to the will and whims of a customer.
Come on, man. Join with me and we can get Apple to cough up some of the few hundred billion dollars it has sitting around to give to Mac customers who demand a parachute. Such a class action lawsuit against Apple is common practice these days. Just ask the folks at Hagens Berman.
iMac and MacBook owners have reported dark smudges and spots on the interior of the screens of their desktop computers as well as excessive slowness and break downs of their computers related to the lack of filter on Apple computers. The computer intakes air to cool its components, but with no filter, dust gets trapped inside. This affects the screen and logic board of the computer, leading to dust stuck behind the screen and gummed up motherboards, causing the computer to run slow and/or overheat.
Oh, the humanity! That’s OMG talk but from Herbert Morrison early in the 20th century. First it was the Hindenburg Disaster, now it’s computers without filters to prevent dirty air from being sucked into a Mac and gumming up the works.
I don’t know about you, but I remember that it takes two to tango, and likely as many to tangle, so maybe if the lawyers running the class action lawsuit against Apple didn’t have clients with dirty air then Apple wouldn’t be obliged to replace a few dozen million Macs sold over the past decade or two.
Does your Mac notebook need a parachute? Of course not. But that doesn’t matter. Let’s sue Apple anyway because a Mac that falls to the floor and breaks obviously has a design defect. We’ll split the settlement money. Lawyers will get 50-percent of a $100-million settlement. Mac customers get $50-million dollars split 50-million ways.