Gambling is a national pastime and a national problem. Is there a cure? Cure gambling? Take a pill. Reduce your weight? Take a pill? Get more energy? Take a pill. I say, ‘Take a placebo.’
I was watching the TV news tonight when I saw a report on a potential cure for gambling. A pill.
The results of a study show that daily doses of an experimental drug called nalmefene, sometimes used to treat alcoholism, appears to curb the gambling appetite.
Celebrity Poker beware. I’ll bet your ratings will fall.
Take the placebo. It’s cheaper, and works about half as often as the real thing. That’s good odds.If you’re a gambler, take heed. Assuming you want a cure for your gambling habits, odds are good that a pill for you is just around the corner.
In four months of controlled tests, as reported in the LA Times, about 65-percent of gambling patients who took nalmefene showed “significant” improvement toward a cure for gambling. See?
There’s hope for Celebrity Poker victims everywhere.
Of course, once the drug is approved to treat compulsive gamblers, I’ll bet you the price goes up substantially. Nalmefene has been used to treat alcoholism. There are plenty of cures for that.
What if your health insurance doesn’t cover gambling treatment? What if you’re poor and don’t have a drinking problem?
Not to worry. According to the results of the tests, about 35-percent of gambling patients in the study also show significant improvement just by taking a placebo.
Take the placebo. It’s cheaper, and works about half as often as the real thing. That’s good odds.
I’ll give you three to one that gamblers who can’t get the real thing can get the placebo on eBay. Even if it costs half as much as the real drug, you’re still ahead.